Ashlee Simpson

[FashionThin]

From a feminist perspective, I personally am not into you making her weight gain about *his* aesthetic enjoyment.

She's doing a terrible thing to her body, she's hurting herself, she's shortening her lifespan and/or her quality of life, which in turn hurts her family and children, she's setting an awful example not just for those kids but for an entire fan base (which apparently thinks this is "healthy" and "beautiful")...and you think the worst thing is that this oh-so-poor man "didn't sign up" to fuck someone ugly? She doesn't owe it to him to be pretty - she owes it to herself and the rest of the world to be healthy.

TL;DR: We all agree she's unbelievably fat and it's not okay. But there are better reasons to be outraged than "poor Evan."

Meh, I agree with @Stealth and feel bad for him too. I guess I'm terrible bc I always think of that when I see a married woman's body change that much. TBH it's hypocritical when I hear some feminists say that a guy is shallow to leave a 200lb whale of a wife for a thin younger woman, but the same ones defend her getting fat bc it's her body . So unless they have an arrangement / open marriage, we just expect the guy to be celibate the rest of his life? We need @Anonymous Bullcock in this thread bc he and I have had this exact conversation.

So on that note I suppose it's all good, as long as Ashlee doesn't still expect him to sleep with her.

 

[skinnieminnie]

So on that note I suppose it's all good, as long as Ashlee doesn't still expect him to sleep with her.

I completely agree with this - was actually talking to my boyfriend and asked how he'd feel if I got fat out of sheer curiosity and he said he'd tell me to start jogging and stop eating - he wouldn't want to dump me because he likes me as a person but he doesn't want to fuck a fat girl, which is totally respectable.
If a guy signs up for one thing it doesn't mean he'll be attracted to his partner 75 pounds later. Can't force attraction and who wants a pity fuck from their s/o?

 

[MickeyMouse]

Meh, I agree with @Stealth and feel bad for him too. I guess I'm terrible bc I always think of that when I see a married woman's body change that much. TBH it's hypocritical when I hear some feminists say that a guy is shallow to leave a 200lb whale of a wife for a thin younger woman, but the same ones defend her getting fat bc it's her body . So unless they have an arrangement / open marriage, we just expect the guy to be celibate the rest of his life? We need @Anonymous Bullcock in this thread bc he and I have had this exact conversation.

So on that note I suppose it's all good, as long as Ashlee doesn't still expect him to sleep with her.

It's an interesting discussion.

I guess it comes down to why are with the person and what you desire from the marriage . Sure EVERYONE wants to feel physically desirable to their partner, but not at the expense of everything else.
Is he with her solely for her looks or her personality AND looks or some other factor(s) and to what degree of each?
What about health? If you marry someone you think is healthy but they turn out to be infertile or soon to be diagnosed with cancer? You didn't sign up for that 5 years earlier despite knowing they smoked etc. Do you then leave them too?

As for age, in my social group people don't marry someone significantly younger than themselves. They would be nicknamed 'youth stealers' which is basically the worst thing you can be called before some criminal conduct. You date and marry your own age. I dated someone significantly older than myself and everyone called him that. Even his family. I couldn't and wouldn't do it again.
So the age issue is very group specific.

I am interested to see other people's views on the topic

At the end of the day, there are far worse things than cheating.
And unhealthy is unhealthy.

 

[Ellie]

There are actually some really interesting responses here. And yeah, in my perfect world people would be attracted to the partners they married no matter what they weigh and lalala flowers sunshine rainbows, but yeah, there is a practical reality here. I don't know.

What about health? If you marry someone you think is healthy but they turn out to be infertile or soon to be diagnosed with cancer? You didn't sign up for that 5 years earlier despite knowing they smoked etc. Do you then leave them too?

Well, if we're going by @Stealth 's traditional marriage values ...yeah, you did: "in sickness and in health."
That's where I'm getting hung up, because i do want to take those vows seriously. If some forms of obesity are illness (I'm talking food addiction, not "muh thyroiddd") is the "moral" decision to try to make them get healthy? Just thinking out loud here.

he said he'd tell me to start jogging and stop eating

Keeper!!
Some people would be outraged to hear your boyfriend's answer (it kinda destroys the PC HAES fantasy) but he's basically looking out for you and your health. Why is helping your SO to quit smoking ok, but helping them kick a food addiction is discrimination??

 

[chicbones]

Why is helping your SO to quit smoking ok, but helping them kick a food addiction is discrimination??

Because people find it so much harder to admit that an addiction to food is a problem than an addiction to smoking.

 

[skinnieminnie]

Keeper!!
Some people would be outraged to hear your boyfriend's answer (it kinda destroys the PC HAES fantasy) but he's basically looking out for you and your health. Why is helping your SO to quit smoking ok, but helping them kick a food addiction is discrimination??

I know I found a good one I was actually thrilled with the answer but would not dare repeat that to someone I know irl because I think they would have a terrible reaction. He knows I'd be unhappy fat so why wouldn't he help me try to fix it if god forbid that happened? Things like this get interpreted as "he only likes you for your looks" like ok, yes he would be less attracted me if at all but the bottom line is it is not healthy to be fat end of story.

 

[Elisa]

Also, her chin implant looks fucking ridiculous...makes her look like an actual wooden puppet.

exactly what i was going to say! before surgery her face was average, no it's just ridiculous. she looks weird.